Find Your Sober Glow!

Happy Sober Sunday!!

First please let me apologise for there being such a delay in me posting – I am really sorry!!

If you are following me on Instagram you will know the reason why…….. I have been training to qualify as a Bodypump Instructor and I have finally done it, whoo hoo!!

It has taken me a lot longer than I ever thought it would do and I can safely say that Les Mills are asking for a very high standard in there assessments, down to clear instructions and millisecond timings.  The standard was much higher than I realised and it took me three attempts to get there but I finally did it. Here is my little Bodypump journey for any of you out there looking to follow the same path and become an instructor,  or just for anyone struggling right now – I hope this may help.

So my first initial training weekend was on the 30th and 31st of March (mothers day – I know, the guilt!)  This involved around 15-20 people spending two days of learning the tracks and being monitored and assessed.  On the Saturday morning I actually felt physically sick during the one hour drive to get there, I was so nervous but I really had no need to be.  There was a mixture of ages and physical abilities within the class but everyone was super friendly.  So I soon calmed down and felt relaxed with everyone.

The first thing we did was the masterclass – which was the new body pump release lead by our instructor Daniel and Damien who were the coaches.  They were amazing and easily showed us how it should be done!  After that it was a full day of practicing our tracks that we had been allocated and then teaching them to the rest of the class. So after day one I felt a lot more confident but also so tired and so hungry! (major tip – take lots of food!)

Day two was pretty much the same formation with your official assessment at the end.  Luckily we all passed and that was an amazing feeling!  Unfortunately though this feeling was short lived as you then have two months to submit full recording of you teaching the whole release to a class, scary!!!  Now two months may sound like a long time but when you include a holiday, the two weeks Easter holidays and basically just life in general getting in the way – then it really isn’t all that long.

So I learnt the release the best I could and submitted my first assessment – you then wait up to two weeks for your results (I know – the torture!)  Ten days later my result came back as a pass pending.  I was so upset, everyone else on the group seemed to be passing as we were updating a Facebook group we had set up – but no not me.  I cried for about half an hour and then thought – well I ‘ve just got to do it again!

So it took me another two weeks to keep practicing and aiming for perfection.  This time I thought it had gone better but my recording had cut out half way through so that knocked my confidence and threw me out with the timing.   But I was just at the point of thinking – sod it! I will send it in anyway and hope for the best.  Guess what- Les Mills don’t want that attitude they want confidence from instructors and they want your recording to run smooth and lets be honest almost perfectly.  So once again I got a pass pending.

Now this time my confidence was really knocked.  All of the self doubt started creeping in – I am too old to be doing this – I’m not good enough – its all a big mistake – its not for me – I cant do it????  Honestly I was so close to giving up and ready to wave my dream of being a bodypump instructor goodbye!!  I was 99% sure I would not be going to submit for assessment again.  My email with the result had come on a Friday and that weekend I had to dig so deep to not stay in bed for 48 hours.  I was gutted, that gutted feeling where you want to escape from being you – that gutted feeling where only sleep or alcohol will allow you to escape.

But I kept myself busy, the kids had netball matchers and we had other stuff that needed doing like cleaning the house!  I also had a really good chat with Damien who was one of the instructors on the training weekend – now talking to him was a game changer for me! He was and is so positive and convinced me to go and shadow him at his gym and told me that I HAD to submit for a third time.

So I did – I went to his classes and his enthusiasm sparked the fire back in me – I became so determined – this is what I want to do and I am not going to stop until I am qualified! For the next couple of weeks I had never done so many squats, lunges and deadlifts in my life.  I recorded myself,  recorded all of my practice classes until I knew the routine inside out and most importantly the timing.  For the first time I sent my recording in feeling CONFIDENT – I honestly felt like I couldn’t have done any better – and after another ten days of torturous waiting …………..yes,  you guessed it I PASSED!

When I opened the email confirming that i was now qualified – the feeling was the best!  The fact that it had taken blood sweat and tears to get their (literally) made it all the more amazing when I finally got there!  And you know what I believe its definitely made me a better instructor now.  I worked so so hard to get there I will never just take it for granted. Les Mills you are a hard act to follow but the constructive criticism and rigorous assessment that you gave me has certainly been for the best and I am so proud to be a Les Mills instructor.

I feel like I have got so much more out of this than a qualification.  I have learnt how important it is to not give-up, no matter how difficult things get.  I will be 32 months sober next week and honestly I have found my sober journey easier than my body pump journey!  But I don’t think I could have one without the other – the drinking me could only dream of achieving something like this and would have given up at the very first hurdle.

I have always said that giving up drinking is only the start of your journey and it is so true.  My challenges used to be just getting through a weekend without a drink, or even one night without a drink!  But now it has slowly led to me challenging myself both physically and mentally and although it sounds dramatic saying that getting sober has changed my life – it really has because it has changed how I feel and my mindset.  I want to fight now for the things I really want in life and I know I have the strength to not give up until I get there.

I will apologise in advance because you are now going to be singing this all night but in the words of Miley Cyrus :

“It ain’t about how fast I get there, ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side – its the climb!”

So to anyone reading this and you are struggling with the early days or million day ones of sobriety – just remember this one thing DO NOT GIVE UP – you will get there.  And if you have a few months of sobriety under your belt and you are starting to want to change certain things about yourself, in your life or challenge yourself in different ways – go for it -you can do it!

I am hopefully going to get back on track with my blogging, although I have just received the Bodypump 110 programme which is now being released, so the learning has started all over again!  Just like my sober journey – things are changing and challenging me all the time!

I hope you’ve had a lovely hangover free weekend and if not and you are looking for help and inspiration then read through my other posts and don’t forget to find me on Instagram  @Liftingweightsnotwine 

Love Angie xx