Tag: just do it

Sober Nights Out!!

April 22, 2018

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So yesterday I hit my 17 month milestone!

I didn’t really do anything major to celebrate but whenever I hit a monthly milestone I will make sure I make time for something nice that day! even if its just grabbing a quiet cappucino somwehere! Yesterday my youngest was at a party all day and my hubbie was building a fence in the garden (because the puppy has decided he wants to eat wood chippings which are making him very poorly – long story!). So I managed to fit in some retail therapy and lunch with my eldest daughter, which was lovely because we very rarely get one on one time together. So that was my mini celebration!

By coincidence I had also arranged a night out with a group of friends from high school. So I wasn’t celebrating 17 months sober but it was perfect that it fell on that date. Now this is one of those lovely get togethers which would never have happened when I was drinking, purely due to logistics! They live a good twenty-minute drive away in all different directions and we  would have struggled to get a taxi there and back. But now I can quite happily pick everyone up, we can have a lovely meal, drinks and a catch up then I can get everyone home safe and sound before heading back myself.

I spoke in a previous post about how much I love my sober nights out (see Will I Lose Friends?) and honestly I never thought I would say those words! But take last night for example, meeting up with friends who I would never normally arrange anything with, chatting away, reminiscing, catching up on their lives and having a really good laugh! And the best bit is you get to remember it all!

In the past the thought of going out and not drinking just wasn’t an option for me, I have said before I was all or nothing when it came to drinking.  And I also started to get paranoid about getting a taxi on my own, so more often than not I would turn down invitations for nights out. How sad is that really? Now I love my nights out, I actually really enjoy the getting ready, feeling good, taking time to laugh, listen and appreciate my friends instead of concentrating on my next drink and chatting crap most of the night. So my nights out have definitely changed, but for the better.

I have always loved going out and I’m a bit of a social butterfly, and this was a huge concern to me that if I stopped drinking that the social side of things would dry up. But they haven’t, if anything I have more dates in my diary now than I ever have, because I have more options to do things with my friends and family, lunch, meals, concerts, musicals. Trying different places you have never been before because you can drive there. I can say “yes” to so much more! So if you like your nights out but want to cut down the drinking or give up altogether then please give it a go, try a sober night out even if it fills you with dread like it did with me. I promise you its a whole new world and you will never look back!

Hope your all feeling fab and fresh this sunday morning? If not, what can you do to change so that next sunday you will be? whats your experience of sober nights out? any tips or advice for others? or please email me for any help or advice at weightsnotwine@gmail.com

Ooooh and I also saw yesterday on the Sober Mummy (Clare Pooley) Facebook page that Eminem had his 10 year soberversary yesterday, so we sort of share the same date (well the 21st part of it anyway!!) how cool is that!!

Happy Sunday!

Angie xx

 

 

 

 

100 Day Challenge!

April 15, 2018

Happy Sunday morning!!! Hope your all having a fab weekend!

So I’ve been home from my holidays for a week, and I’m thinking I need to have something new to aim for. Like most people I was focusing on my holiday, eating well, keeping up my workouts and having the goal of feeling good in a bikini to keep me motivated! Anyway now the holiday is over and the girls are due to go back to school, I feel like I need a new challenge, a new goal to aim towards.

I’ve had a few emails from followers, asking how I stay motivated or get started on the fitness path? For me I need to have a focus, something to aim for. For example, when I first stopped drinking I logged my weight every 10 days, and wrote it down in the back of Jason Vales – Kick The Drink book that I had read at the start of my journey. I wanted to be the healthiest and fittest I could be as a result of not drinking and that was my new focus. I wasn’t obsessed with my weight but it was just good to see the weights coming off, very slowly sometimes but it was good to see it logged down. I know what works for me, and having a goal and tracking my progress to see how I am doing is personally a huge motivator.

There are all different kinds of challenges you can set yourself. You can be aiming for a month, 100 days of not drinking, then a year. It may be that you want to lose weight, drop a dress size, incorporate a new healthy food or drink for a month? Or maybe you could book a challenge such as a 5k, 10krun, a bike ride, a mud run challenge. I booked a Tough Mudder last year and although it scared me to death knowing I was actually doing one, it certainly made me train for it!!!

Once you have set your challenge whatever that maybe, it makes it a focus, a priority. We are all busy, we all spend a lot of time doing things for other people, work, kids, partners, parents, friends, and now I’ve a puppy thrown in the mix! But by setting yourself a challenge, you can prioritise it each day, to make sure you get one step nearer to your goal. You owe it to yourself, it’s important to you, make sure you make the time to do it and don’t let yourself down.

Once you’ve started to think this way, it will become a normal part of your day, and that’s when it becomes part of your lifestyle.

I’ve decided to set myself a 100 day challenge to exercise every day for at least 20 minutes to an hour. It can be anything from a full weights workout, a run, a fitness dvd to a family bike ride or power walk with the pup! But I will log it everyday on Instagram just to make sure I keep on track. If anyone wants to join me, that would be fab, even if it’s a totally different challenge! Maybe healthy eating for 100 days, then post your food pictures in the comments! Maybe you want to do a month or 50 days, whatever works for you? Let me know your goals and let’s motivate each other! We’ve got this!

Day one will start tomorrow.

And remember a one hour workout is 4% of your day!

Angie xx

Will I lose friends?

April 12, 2018

What would my friends think? Will I still get invited out? I can’t stop drinking now because we’ve got a night out with friends this weekend? Will I lose friends?

This was a huge concern to me in the run up to me stopping drinking. I’ve always been the party girl, ( probably less now I’ve got the kids) but still the one wanting to stay out, carry on the party, making sure alcohol was involved when I was catching up with friends. So when I wanted to stop drinking I worried that I would lose some of my friends who I did all these things with. But guess what, I didn’t! And I can’t believe I would use that excuse (in my head) to not stop drinking.

I mean yes there are friends that I don’t see as much of now, because our friendship was mainly based on going out. But my close friends, my handful of “call them anytime and they are there for me no matter what” friends, they are still my very close friends, even closer! They have all supported me, yes a few were shocked initially, but they’ve all accepted and supported me along the way, which is what true friends do right! They know who they are, they are my cheerleaders and they are amazing, we still have nights out, meet up, do lunch, have takeaway nights, go camping or on holidays. We still see each other just as much as before. But for me I feel like I make the most of my friends now, I appreciate them a lot more than I used to, I feel like a better listener when I’m sober, I feel like a better friend. I’ve also realised how important it is to have friends that you can be yourself with, who you can really laugh with, that’s the buzz of a catch up now for me, not having conversations I can’t remember!

I’ve also found how not drinking creates an awkwardness with some people, and I can’t put my finger on why? Maybe it makes them look at their own drinking habits, which they don’t want to do!

But I know I’ve got good, close friends behind me, there for me like I am for them, and I will never ever take that for granted. My circle of friends maybe slightly smaller but those friendship ties are definitely a lot stronger.

And another bonus it that I love nights out more than ever! I can spend my wine money on a new outfit and taxi us all out and about, what’s not to love!

Have your friends supported you in your journey? Or have you found who your true friends are? Is there any awkwardness between you and friends? Can you offer any advice to other readers?

Thanks

Angie x

Happy, Healthy Holidays!

April 7, 2018

Sorry it’s been a while since I last blogged but I’ve been on a family holiday in beautiful Crete!

This has been my second sober beach holiday as we went to Majorca last June, and I can honestly say it’s been my best beach holiday yet!

So it makes me start thinking why?

The first picture is taken about seven years ago, on holiday in Spain. I was at a point where I didn’t exercise at all, I was drinking a couple of nights a week and every weekend, on crazy diets all week and then pigging out all weekend. I can remember trying to lose weight the week before the holiday by not eating. Crazy! I can see that now!

My holiday would then consist of eating whatever I wanted, drinking whatever I wanted and spending most of it sat by the pool in shorts and a tshirt with no confidence to walk around in a bikini. The “sod it, I’m on holiday!” would start from my first wines on the plane, to using up spare change as an excuse for wines on the way back! I still have a few good memories of the holiday, the kids were young and it was our first holiday abroad as a family, but my confidence and happiness with myself was at an all time low.

Fast forward to this holiday and it’s just so different!

Firstly, the biggie, is that this time I’m sober. Its my second sober holiday, which has made that side of things easier because I know I can do it. It’s a perfect time to try different non alcoholic drinks, there’s always a wide selection of mocktails, there’s fresh juices, tonic water, soda. Where we stayed didn’t have any non alcoholic beer or wine so it made me experiment more, and my favourite was a mocktail called hibiscus lemonade- delicious! The old me would have drunk white wine, nothing else, possibly the odd lager, no new tastes there!

I have tried to eat lots of different, healthy fresh foods. I’ve enjoyed my desserts too, I’ve had lots and always put fresh fruit with them to try and balance it out, makes me feel better anyway! But I’ve not craved carbs or a fry up to cure a hangover. I’ve tried different foods and made the most of all the fresh fruit and vegetables.

The old me would never pack trainers for a holiday! I didn’t do trainers, ever! But this time my kit was packed and I’ve exercised every day in the gym, and we’ve also done family activities too, rounders, basketball, aqua boarding and even tai chi!

The main thing is that I’ve had the energy and the confidence to do all these other things. I have so many more memories to take home, for me and for the family. I have been fully present everyday for my girls, at night we’ve sat in the bar til late and chatted, played cards, I’ve not been on a different level,in my own little wine world. And most importantly I feel refreshed and recharged not feeling like I need a holiday to recover from this one!

Have you a holiday planned for the summer? Will it be your first sober holiday, or have you any advice to offer for others? What can you do to make this holiday different to others, make it healthier, try new things?

Make your next holiday one to remember for all the right reasons!

Angie x

Moderating Madness…….

March 24, 2018

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Ok so for me moderating anything,  let alone alcohol is impossible! I am definitely an all or nothing sort of person, some people call it an addictive personality, I like to think of it as passionate! I don’t do sitting on the fence, moderating or grey areas, I’m either in or out, I either love it or hate it!

So for me moderating alcohol was just a no go area although it took me a long time to realise this. The amount of time I would spend thinking about how much I should drink?  Should I have another glass? Should I open another bottle? Should I say I’m driving? And to be honest as soon as I had a couple of glasses any plans I had spent all week putting together of moderating went out of the window, so all that time was wasted, pointless energy!

And then, if on the odd occasion I would manage to have just one glass, I would think well  what’s the point?  There was no enjoyment in one glass it would just leave me wanting more and feeling miserable, not pleased or happy with myself.

People will debate this and there are a lot of mixed views out there.  But I do strongly believe there are people who CAN have just one drink then stop, they are the people who will probably never need to stop or want to stop drinking because they don’t have a problem with it. But then there are others, like me, for who that one glass is never enough.

So for me the only option was to have a total break from the booze and see how I felt, see if I could manage and carry on as normal without drinking. I didn’t put a time limit on it but just seemed to carry on and on, one day at a time.  I realised that by removing alcohol from my life I had also removed all the time I spent thinking about trying to control it too. Suddenly I had all this space and time to fill with other stuff!  So with me being all or nothing I went all out healthy! I started filling my mind with positive stuff, such as exercise, challenges, recipes, planning healthy meals, and just more of the good positive stuff!

This blog isn’t about  preaching to others  to stop drinking,  it’s just to share my journey to better health.  Everyone knows that you don’t have to stop drinking to get healthy, but for me I felt it was the only option and it’s what worked for me.  It’s totally turned my health and lifestyle around, I’ve turned into someone I never thought I could be and that’s a pretty amazing feeling!

So are you one of the lucky people who can stop at one glass? Can anyone give any advice for other readers on how to moderate? Or are you like me – an all or nothing kinda person? And that’s nothing to be ashamed of, we are the passionate, crazy ones don’t forget! I would love to hear what you guys think………..

Happy Saturday!

Angie xx

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